Margarete Stokowski

Margarete Stokowski’s life story begins in much the same way as that of many other German migrants. Born in Zabrze in 1986, she has just turned two when her parents decide to move to Germany where she grows up in Neukölln, Berlin’s most multicultural suburb. This is where she first begins to observe public life. She soon discovers, although unconsciously as a child, that there are gender patterns which you have to follow or systematically reject. “The categories of “girl” or “boy” are there from the start. There isn’t that one moment in which you are sent out onto the stage in the big theatre of gender roles.”[1]

Stokowski has always been fascinated by strong women. Reading the biography of Maria Skłodowska-Curie reinforces her intention to study physics for which, incidentally, she has the best qualifications. But ultimately, she decides to study philosophy and social sciences at the Humboldt University in Berlin. In 2014 she completes her academic education with a work about the French author, philosopher and feminist Simone de Beauvoir. In one of her interviews, Stokowski admits that it was the need to forge a path in the male-dominated science discipline that put her off studying physics. “You either have to be strong enough to simply ignore the clichés and the opposition, or you have to actively fight against them – both options take up a lot of energy.” [2]

Margarete Stokowski has had a presence in the media as an author of feminist columns and essays since 2009, for instance in the “taz”, in “Missy Magazine”, on “Zeit Online” and since 2015 as a permanent employee on the “Spiegel Online” editorial team. However, her intrinsic popularity and the critical interest in her work are all thanks to her début novel “Untenrum frei” [“Naked down below”], which was published as a hardback in the Rowohlt Verlag in 2016 and in whose foreword the author asserts that this book is not a manifesto even though it contains many opinions that could sound like it. Stokowski clearly defines what she understands under the term feminism writing: “For me, feminism means that all people irrespective of their gender, their sexuality and their body should have the same rights and freedoms.”[3] By putting her feminist demands in words, the author signals a difficult and painful fight for equality. At the same time, she admits that she has difficulty describing herself as a feminist: “In the vast majority of cases, it gives me the creeps to associate myself with a group and if I did have to design an ideal society, it would, above all, be one in which I have peace.“[4] However, the author believes that it can be an advantage if a lot of people perceive feminism as a judgemental label: “Labelling distracts. We’ve got better things to do. Feminism is not something that better PR will turn into a more attractive product that is then simply casually swallowed by everyone in passing. It is a fight for fundamental justice.“[5]

In her books, Margarete Stokowski addresses classic topics such as power, sex, equality and gender-appropriate language that should be associated with feminism. She points out the deficits in sex education and the feelings of shame that accompany not just adolescent girls. She describes the fear of the lack of acceptance and the attempts to find oneself again at any cost in the common mainstream ideals of beauty and in predefined social roles. Stokowski lays open the mechanisms that block us as a society and she shows that they can be overcome although their existence often has to be established first. Stokowski recognises the real danger in the fight for equality as being in our habituation to existing situations and in accepting roles and differences that have supposedly been there forever so therefore can’t be changed. At the same time, however, she admits that the predefined social roles can simplify a lot of things. In the author’s opinion, renouncing traditional patterns presents an opportunity that opens up an experiment, the implications of which are not yet clear.

With her outspoken language, her intransigent opinions and the controversial topics she deals with, Stokowski quickly became a well known feminist. Her books hold the top spots in the bestseller lists for weeks at a time and she is in demand as a guest for interviews and as a commentator on current social debates, although she doesn’t just limit herself to her feminist ideals. Phenomena, such as racism and right-wing populism as well as climate change are just as important to her. Some critics compare Stokowski with Alice Schwarzer, the pioneer of German feminism. But in fact the relationship between the two women is quite cool: Stokowski openly accuses Schwarzer of racism and Islamophobia by commenting in this sense on the statements made by the doyenne of the women’s movement on the politicised Islam and its influence on Germany and Europe. In turn, Alice Schwarzer, piqued by the exaggerated portrayal of herself as a frail old person, like the ones in television programmes that do nothing but sit in armchairs, which Stokowski meant as a satire, accuses the young feminist of misogyny.[6]

In her articles, Stokowski does not just devote herself to blatantly feminist topics, she also tackles issues relating social inequalities in other areas of life. For example, in one of her texts she deals with the myth of desired bilingualism and establishes that there are “good” and “bad” languages in Germany. In this article, the author’s own painful experience is expressed: “As a child, I thought for a long time that growing up bilingual meant that, other than German, you speak French or English at home and not what the ‘Polacks’ and ‘Dagos’ do. ‘Bilingual’ sounded like something worth having whilst as a child I had the feeling that my mother tongue was something that I had better get rid of.“[7]

The second book by Margarete Stokowski, “Die letzten Tage des Patriarchats” [“The final days of the patriarchy”] , was published in October 2018 and contains 75 columns and essays from 2011 to 2018, which were predominantly written for the “taz” and “Spiegel Online”. This selection clearly reflects how Stokowski the feminist has developed. The texts cover the whole bandwidth from the first sexual experience to participation in social debates, such as “Regretting Motherhood” and the #MeToo movement. In the latter case, Stokowski polemicises with the proposition that some commentators are wrong when they claimed that the discourse triggered in the film industry about the sexual abuse of women is just a luxury problem among the privileged classes. She states: “Even an educated white woman is allowed to complain.”[8]

In the foreword to this book, Margarete Stokowski refers to another issue of our time: Hate speech. The author is confronted with this poison both on the Internet and in her everyday life. “There are readers who blame their writings on psychiatric diagnoses or send insults or threats, sometimes from their professional email addresses, as an engineer, a lawyer or a university lecturer. (…) Cynically, most threats of violence come after texts about violence (closely followed by topics about migration).”[9]

Margarete Stokowski is already well recognised and she has already enjoyed enormous success, but in spite of this she seems to keep on developing herself. In her texts, the feminist has succeeded in consciously provoking and posing difficult questions in a very direct way. By peppering her observations with a large dose of irony, the author proves that humour, anger and socially relevant topics are not mutually exclusive.

Monika Stefanek, april 2019